ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I need to align my fucking chakras
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize