Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
