she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize