her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
