Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Randomize
