This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
