Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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