I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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