Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
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