an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
