you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize