Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
