i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Randomize
