I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
