operation harelip BJ is a go
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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