I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
and she was petting her beer can
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
