I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
