ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Randomize
