This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
