He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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