4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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