I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Randomize