im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
