Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
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