Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
