i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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