THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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