Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
