arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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