i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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