Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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