Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize
