We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
