ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
