Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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