It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
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