nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
