Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
