end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
