So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Randomize