Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Randomize
