She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
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