This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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