Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
