oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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