Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I see more hoeing in ur future
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