remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
