Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
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