matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
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