Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
