i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize
